March is such a special month in our family because we celebrate a number of birthdays. But there is one birthday in March that is very special to me, this week I celebrate the 43rd birthday of my only son, James.
As I lay on the table waiting for the doctor to return, I wasn't prepared for what he was about to tell me, "everything looks good, the IUD is in place but... you are pregnant". I started to cry. "We cannot remove the IUD or the baby will abort, but don't worry the IUD will just float along side the baby and it will come out with the afterbirth".
As I got into the car where my mother was waiting to pick me up, I burst into another flood of tears and told her the news. She looked at me and without a blink she said, "Well, the way I see it you have two choices... you can cry and feel sorry for yourself and make this pregnancy hard on you and the baby or you can accept this baby as a gift and start thanking the Lord for it now.
There in the car, at that moment I chose to thank God for my new gift.
Me pregnant in my eighth month holding Kerri.
After James was taken away by the nurses, the doctor was having trouble finding the IUD. I was aware that there was a problem and we joked about the baby not handing him the IUD... I was not a fan of the anesthetic at the time, so I had a natural childbirth without anything. I was Aware. Not finding the IUD he scheduled me for a D and C the next morning and I signed the papers.
I woke up from the D and C with great pain in my abdomen and also a large incision. The head of obstetrics came in and explained to me exactly what they found. The IUD was initially inserted wrong and perforated my cervix, thus my pregnancy... it never worked (a relief for me after finding out how it functioned). But it also tore a hole in the uterine wall, traveled through it and eventually lodged in my intestines. I carried this baby full term with a hole in my uterus. The doctor was quite excited over all this, he said they also found my appendix swollen twice it's size and removed it (hmmm a two for, I thought).
He went on to give me the statistics of this birth and the healthy condition of the baby and ended by saying... he was a miracle baby.
The pre and post natal care, hospital bill and surgery was all taken care of by my attending physician. No, I did not sue, Yes, I had a case but does one bring allegations for an unwanted pregnancy against someone... when that pregnancy is from the hand of God... not this person nor my husband.
One of the greatest joys of my heart and a blessing to my soul.
Happy Birthday to my son, my gift and my blessing.
In my life, I believe all things come from God or is allowed by God, I am His child. Whatever comes my way He has already prepared a way for me, when I seek Him first. He only has good things for me, just as a loving father has for his child, even though sometimes we do not understand the gifts. Even though we do not perceive them as gifts but trials or mountains or insurmountable problems.
And we know that all things work together for good, for those that love God and are called according to His purpose.
I wonder if while sitting in that car 43 years ago listening to my mother's words and the choice I had before me... what if I had chosen not to be thankful, what if I had chosen to just go with my selfish feelings and let the circumstances of what I thought them to be overwhelm me... I wonder if the outcome would have been the same.
In all circumstances give thanks, for this is the will of Christ Jesus concerning you. 1Thess. 5:18
I believe our choices allow God to work and we see His glory in our lives the more we choose to just trust him.
We all have choices, sometimes we don't always make the right ones and I am the first in line for bad choices but I believe God's grace is sufficient for those also. And as we become more aware of our choices and choose to be thankful and trust Him, the more we will see the hand of God clearly.
Today if you are facing a mountain you seem to think is impassable I encourage you to give it over to God, start thanking Him for the gift that He has in this challenge. Trust Him, He will not fail you.
Every good gift and every perfect gift comes down from the father of lights, with whom there is no variation, neither shadow cast by turning. James 1:17